It's been quite a roller coaster ride the last couple weeks! And the ride is sure to get bumpy as I fight for my life. I don't think anyone reads this blog who doesn't know me, so I am going to go ahead and write and post as did with my last cancer battle in 2007.
The fluid around my heart and in my right lung is beginning to reaccumulate and the Dr's are "sure" a spreading cancer is causing it. I am re-starting the "There are No Incurable Diseases" program and have ordered Protocel (www.outsmartyourcancer.com).
Humanly we can only do so much. God is in control! I am clinging to this! Please pray for me. "...and the prayer offered in faith will restore the one who is sick and the Lord will raise him up... "James 5:15
I am going to need assistance in juicing, shopping and hanging tough, so prayers for a helper or where I need to be, are appreciated.
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Hey there... I must say, it's been a while since I've visited your little blog Denise, and although I am big and tough enough not to get a tear in my eye, I had to take a decent gulp or two to gather myself...
I see so many things here to rejoice in. Beautiful pictures of nature out your back door, family and friends, prosperity, progression, and a terribly impressive lineage of Retrievers...
I just got back from a little holiday in Malaysia to visit my good friend Siva. It was great to see him, but wow, what a different way of living than what I am used to. Although I was charmed by some things, the perspective I have gained from such travels sure makes me thankful for my family and our blessings.
I often get this sensation of peeking into the eventuations of my loved ones like this epic movie that I'm missing most parts of. But every moment I do catch makes sense in the scheme of things and makes me smile.
Now my cousins are as old as I remember their parents being, their parents the age I remember my Grandparents. There are new inclusions to the family that I have yet to spend time with, new talents, careers, houses, even cool looking inflatable kayaks that I have got to try.
Some things are different now, but for the most part it all has a feeling of rightness.
Call it God's plan or destiny or something else entirely, from my perspective it seems worthy of thanks and praise.
I'm sorry to hear that you face more challenges ahead with your health. Although I can't imagine what it takes to confront those challenges courageously, I am at least practiced in standing beside my loved ones as they face such hurdles.
It's times like this that I feel the furthest away from you all in distance, but at the same time it takes me right there in spirit.
I suppose that's easy to say, but I attest to a longing to be there with you all, have a few laughs, some good food and a day spent playing on the water. And I must admit I am a little jealous that you all still get to do this stuff without me...
Without a doubt, it gives me motivation to get in shape so I can give Dane a run for his money up to that China Hat.
But in attempt to address the title of this blog, I think I can imagine how strong the 'why me?' feeling must be in moments such as this... Hell, I was having such an experience over the most trivial situation just moments before I sat down to read your blog. And then, on a dime, that silly sensation ceased... Suddenly there was perspective, as the things I loved shown before me and whatever hurdles I had to face seemed like the wrong aspect to focus on.
There is no taking away the shittyness of the situation you have to deal with, that's for sure. You can't hide from it.... But at the same time, those burdens can never truly take away from your blessings. They are yours and ours forever.
As always, Matt
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